Marriage Therapy in Denver, CO—Relationship Counselors
Marriage is the grand finale of a relationship, according to decades worth of romantic comedies. Think about movies like Sleepless in Seattle, My Best Friend’s Wedding, You’ve Got Mail, Enough Said, Love Actually, Hitch, 27 Dresses, and more. Finding the love of your life is the hard part. Once a couples is together, the relationship is easy, right? Wrong. In real life, marriage is a new beginning, not the end of the story. Many, many spouses are learning that the ideal of a happily-ever-after is much harder than they ever anticipated and much harder that Rom-coms and Sit-coms ever portrayed. The truth is that it is normal for a marriage to struggle and experience hardship. There is a reason most wedding vows include the commitment to each other “in good times and bad, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health.” The truth is that many of these relational struggles are not resolved within a 2-hour screenplay, but there is help. More and more, spouses are going to marriage counseling when they go through more difficult seasons of their relationship.
“A great marriage is not when the ‘perfect couple’ comes together.
It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.”
– Dave Meurer
The counselors at Thriveworks Denver know that building a strong, long-term marriage is easier said than done. That is why we offer marriage therapy. Our mental health professionals have worked with many clients, helping them find a way forward for their marriage.
When Could We Go to Marriage Counseling?
This is a common question that spouses ask themselves or each other: when is the right time to start marriage therapy? In many ways, only the couple can answer this question. There are many reasons that spouses begin marriage therapy, and there is no right or wrong time to start therapy. It may be helpful to know a few of the reasons other couples have started marriage counseling. This list is not exhaustive, but it gives a picture of some of the common relational issues that spouses may face and that a marriage therapist may help them resolve. Many spouses begin marriage therapy because they are…
1) Not talking to each other.
When problems go unresolved, spouses can withdraw from each other. When spouses are not arguing or are not even speaking to each other, that marriage may be struggling in one of two ways. Spouses may be so exhausted with conflict, they have given up. Instead of engaging problems, they stonewall each other. Another possibility is that one spouse has so dominated the other’s thinking and feeling that they have given up on their own individuality and chosen to conform instead of fight. In both cases, the marriage is in danger and may benefit from marriage counseling.
2) Arguing all the time.
All spouses disagree and debate. It is normal, even healthy, for spouses to differ. However, when there is more disagreement than connection, the marriage may be in trouble. In fact, the ratio of positive and negative interactions should not be equal. Many marriage therapists content that for every negative interaction a couple has, they need five positive ones to sustain their relationship. When this ratio is off, spouses can often benefit from marriage therapy.
3) Working through infidelity.
Affairs can destroy a marriage, but they do not have to. In many cases, the right path forward is ending the marriage. In other cases, the right path forward is continuing the marriage. In both cases, a marriage therapist may be able to help one or both spouses find healing and a way to rebuild trust. The key is working through and resolving the problem directly.
4) Trying to change one another.
A sign of any healthy relationship is that people accept each other for who they are, and in a marriage, this is particularly important. When spouses try to change each other, they often experience disappointment, tension, and shame. They may see each other for who they are not, instead of appreciating each other for who they are. In many cases, each individual does need to grow, but change should always come from an internal motivation. Spouses can only control themselves—not their partners. Marriage therapists can often teach couples how to relate to each other in a healthier way.
Scheduling Marriage Counseling at Thriveworks Denver
Marriage counseling is not a silver bullet or a guarantee. Often, marriage therapy leads to a better, stronger relationship when both partners are open to change and willing to make adjustments. Often, marriage therapy means that spouses realize the best path forward is to divorce amicably. In both cases, many people are glad they reach out for help, and they experience many on-going benefits from working with a marriage counselor. If you recognized something on the list of why couples go to therapy, it may be time to reach out. If you did not recognize anything on that list, but you have a feeling that it is the right time for counseling, you are probably right. It may be time to get started. Thriveworks Denver is ready to get started too. We offer marriage therapy, and we have appointments available.
When you call our office to make an appointment, know that a scheduling specialist will answer your call, but you will not reach a voicemail. New clients often have their first appointment within 24 hours, but we do not put any of our clients on a waitlist. Instead, we offer evening and weekend sessions. We also take a variety of insurance plans. Call Thriveworks Denver today.