If you are anything like me, by now your new year’s resolutions have fallen to the wayside. Or if you are one of the lucky few, your resolutions have become apart of your routine and more of a habit. This challenge should not be confused with those “oh so much fun to come up with and impossible to actually keep” resolutions. First, this challenge is for 30 days. We can do anything for just 30 days, right? Second, my hope is the impact on your relationships would far exceed what you normally obtain from those other resolutions. So let’s  your 30 day challenge get started…

Materials Needed:

  • A pad of paper (bonus points if you can get paper in the favorite color of your loved one)
  • A pen
  • A loved one/Spouse/Child/Roommate/Friend

Not too difficult so far!

For the next 30 days I want you to write down 1 thing a day that you appreciate about them, something you admire about their personality, talents, or about a day you enjoyed spending time with one another. This can be done with anyone, adult or child. Put the note somewhere to surprise them each day.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I remember to do this?

You know that handy dandy thing that is attached to your hip at all times, your cell phone. Go right now and put a reminder in your phone to write the note every day.

What if I run out of things to say?

You can write anything about the person. Personality traits, strengths you have noticed in them, favorite memories (even from a long time ago), the day they were born, the day you got married. Thank them for being them. The possibilities are endless.

Can I text them?

You can, of course, but that would not be my first choice. I think we are on technology so much now days that a hand written note stands apart from the endless texts, Facebook/Instagram/Whatever the newest site is, I can’t keep up. This would also give that individual the opportunity to save the notes if they would like.

It’s been 5/10/15 days and they have not said a word. Should I continue?

Don’t get discouraged if you don’t get a reaction. I have had many teen-agers get teary eyed in my office telling me about notes their parents had given to them when they had not said a word to their parents. We all know that for many teens (and adults) direct communication is not their strong suite. Keep going for your 30 days. I would be willing to bet you see a positive change in that relationship at the end of the month.

I think we all have a tendency at times to assume that our loved ones know how we feel. But I also think we all like to hear it at times! Writing can be a good way to express some of your feelings towards your loved one, particularly for those that may be a little reluctant regarding feeling expression face-to-face. You may start this challenge at any time. However for those that do things in a more organized fashion than I tend to, February would be a great month to begin. I know a lot of people have mixed feelings about the upcoming Valentine’s Day. Maybe we can just look at is as a month to remind us to show people how much we love them. And that’s doesn’t have to be with chocolates and teddy bears and jewelry. I will be doing this with my family the month of February as well. So good luck and may the 30 day challenge began!

On your mark…get set…go!!!!