Westborough Marriage Counseling

Westborough Marriage Counseling—Counselors and Therapists

Do you lay next to someone every night in bed, but feel like you are worlds away? Do you spend more time arguing with your spouse than laughing? Do you miss the spontaneity and fun that you used to have together? If this describes your marriage, you are not alone. We have all heard the dire statistics on the success of marriage. You may feel like you are headed in that direction with no hope of saving your relationship. The professionals at Thriveworks Westborough Marriage Counseling can help give your marriage a fighting chance.

For some couples, problems arise and they can easily resolve them and move past them. For others, even the slightest disagreements turn into serious issues. Sometimes it is the same fight, just a different day. You keep discussing and arguing over the same issues, possibly even for years. Once couples get into such a negative way of interacting with each, it can be difficult to break the cycle.

When couples are in such a negative pattern, it is very helpful to have an outside perspective to clarify and help move past the issues you are facing. Marriage counseling can inject new life into your relationship, as well as helping to foster better communication and mutual respect. One of the trained therapists at Thriveworks Westborough Marriage Counseling can help both partners feel comfortable sharing their feelings and emotions openly in the safe environment of the counseling office.

Why Pursue Marriage Counseling?

We are all very familiar with the statistic that 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. In addition to this, so many couples find themselves in “emotional divorce.” When couples find themselves in this state, you may be physically still with your partner, but you are emotionally completely distant and severed.

Anyone who has been married will tell you; it is not always easy. Living with another human being requires patience and flexibility. There are so many potential areas of disagreement and discord that it is easy to see how so many marriages fail. Relationships and families are complicated.

Do any of these issues sound familiar?

  • Communication difficulties
  • Problems with in-laws and extended family
  • Anger issues, yelling, slamming of doors
  • Dependency/co-dependency
  • Family planning, to have or not have children
  • Parenting issues and disagreements
  • Jealousy, lack of trust
  • Unresolved issues from past relationships
  • Adultery/infidelity
  • Overscheduled lives, “Passing each other in the night”

This is by no means a complete list of issues that marriages face. Perhaps your issue popped out immediately. Alternatively, perhaps you did not see anything familiar on the list, but you know your relationship needs help. This is just the beginning of a list of possibilities of what can be causing difficulties for a relationship.

Feeling miles away from the person that is supposed to be your partner in life can be extremely lonely and frustrating. Laying awake at night, sitting in silence at the dinner table, arguing over silly things day after day; this is no way to live. You both may have a great deal of anger to deal with over the course of counseling. This will not be easy, but it is possible with a trained and experienced Thriveworks counselor.

Marriage Counseling Exercises

“While therapists vary in their clinical styles and the interventions they use, marriage counseling often involves a therapist helping couples identify and understand the sources of their conflicts and working with them to resolve them,” explains Ayala Hamami, a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker at our Westborough office. “The therapist can help partners develop skills that strengthen the relationship in areas like communication, problem-solving, and conflict resolution. The therapist can provide feedback on the interactional patterns they are observing play out in the session and help the couple to practice alternative responses that can break a cycle that is creating tension, distancing, or otherwise hindering the couple’s ability to get on the same page and feel mutually understood and supported.”

A world-renowned researcher, Dr. John Gottman, has developed an effective theory for marriage and couples counseling known as “Love Banking.” When couples put this into practice, love banking is one of many exercises that can help couples develop or define trust and positive energy within their marriage. The caring professionals at Thriveworks Westborough Marriage Counseling can help you employ this in your relationship and establish it as a daily practice in your life.

This exercise establishes that your relationship is a bank account. This account can be very wealthy or very poor. It can be overdrawn or it can have excessive positive energy. In this exercise, you learn to view every interaction with your spouse as a “deposit” or “withdrawal.”

Withdrawals

A withdrawal is a request or demand put upon the other partner. This can also include fights, insults, and any negative dialogue.

If your marriage is having trouble, you are most likely having a great deal of withdrawals as well.

  • If you say “Pick up your socks.” — That is a withdrawal.
  • If you say “I can’t talk now. Don’t bother me at work.” — That is a withdrawal.
  • If you say “I don’t understand what you do all day; it’s a disaster in here!” — That is a withdrawal.

Although some of these may sound like simple requests, they are still withdrawals. The more serious types of withdrawals include fights and insults, such as name-calling and swearing.

It is bad to be overdrawn in your bank account. It is also bad to be overdrawn in your marriage. Without deposits, you cannot make withdrawals. If your marriage bank account is empty, you will feel lonely, withdrawn, and resentful. You may feel better alone than with your spouse.

Deposits

Dr. Gottman’s research reveals that in order for your relationship to stay healthy and not withdrawn, the couple needs to have 5 deposits for every 1 withdrawal. It is a magical 5-to-1 ratio. If your marriage is a very negative place, it can seem very overwhelming to even come up with one deposit per day. But it is possible. You can change the tide of your relationship.

In a marriage, you make deposits by expressing love and care for your spouse. Another researcher, Gary Chapman, has developed what he calls “The Five Love Languages.”

These include:

  • Words of Affirmation
  • Gifts
  • Acts of Service
  • Quality Time
  • Physical Touch

Words of Affirmation

This love language is exactly as it sounds. We use our words to encourage and build up our spouse. This can be spoken, in writing, in recognition of something big or small. It is an important and simple was to express love to your partner.

Gifts

This love style is also quite simple. Tokens of appreciation, even inexpensive ones, can show someone that they are thought of and loved. If you or your spouse have the love language of gifts, it does not mean you are materialistic. Rather, it is simply that some people respond best to being given a tangible reminder of another’s love for them.

Acts of Service

Washing the car, walking the dog, changing the baby’s diaper, doing the laundry; these are the types of jobs that most people do not love. But for someone who really values this type of love language, these acts of service mean a great deal.

Quality Time

Going out to dinner, watching a tv show together, having a long conversation, taking a walk; the love language of “quality time” is about giving undivided attention to another person. The activity that takes place during the quality time is not as important as focusing on the other person.

Physical Touch

An embrace, a kiss and holding hands are all expressions of love. As an important love language for many, without having this account full, it is difficult to even appreciate other expressions of affection. Physical contact and touch can relate to intimacy, but it also includes simple acts of affection as well.

Learning how you and your spouse both give and receive love is very helpful for your relationship. Once you know your spouse’s most meaningful expression of love, you can put a great deal of deposits into this type of language.

Thriveworks marriage counselors can help you put this exercise into practice in your marriage immediately. You can use the information on different love languages to fulfill your five to one ratio of deposits and withdrawals.

Why Choose Thriveworks Westborough Marriage Counselors?

“One of the biggest misconceptions about marriage counseling is that couples seeking therapy are broken or incompatible. The truth of the matter is that we were never taught in school ‘how to do relationships well’ and there is no one-size-fits-all manual when it comes to knowing the steps that best suit the relational dance that has developed between two partners,” says Hamami. “When we consider the fact that a partnership is the coming together of two individuals, each with their own unique life experiences, backgrounds, family dynamics, etc., we can reasonably expect that it may be challenging at times to always understand and be equipped to handle differences in areas like communication, conflict resolution, and coping styles.” So, if you and your partner are struggling to get along or work through a given problem, consider talking to a marriage counselor—and don’t feel any shame in doing so.

Thriveworks Counseling has marriage counselors who can help you create the marriage that you both deserve. Whatever the source of the issues in your relationship, both partners deserve to have respect and happiness, whether together or apart. Discovering the best path for the future of your marriage would be our honor. We have the skills to help you develop new, healthy ways to deal with these problems and develop healthy communication.

We do not have a waitlist and we have appointments available immediately. We respect that you have a busy life, and that you may have been trying to find the time to call for quite some time. We respect that making that first call for help is easy. We are ready when you are. Thriveworks marriage counselors can help you and your partner create the healthy, loving, and respectful relationship that you both desire.

Call Thriveworks marriage counselors at 774-377-4939 to get started on the path to change!
 
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

People Love Our Providers!

Overall Rating: 5★★★★★ based on 39 5 1 39 reviews. See all reviews
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Donna hayes

★★★★★
Hello all, I just want to tell everyone at thriveworks in Westboro mass office and future customers that I have had the pleasure of a 5 star counselor in donna hayes. Donna helped me when I was at the lowest point in my life. A law enforcement life, with lots of issues. She has helped me immensely. God bless you donna. Hopefully I will see you in fall when I return home. Thanks for your help and sorry for quitting exit today on my last appointment. Best regards always. Brian
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I’ve had a wonderful experience.

★★★★★
I’ve had a wonderful experience. The staff is punctual and kind.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

My therapist is very supportive and communicative.

★★★★★
Thriveworks has been wonderful so far. My therapist is very supportive and communicative. The appointment reminders are very helpful, too.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I love my therapist

★★★★★
I love my therapist and feel better about my life knowing that I have guidance and direction in my life
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

My therapist is thoughtful

★★★★★
My therapist is thoughtful, compassionate, incisive in a good way, understands complex trauma, and is full of good humor.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Attentive, note-taking, observant

★★★★★
For a first visit, this place set a very good example for what is ahead. Attentive, note-taking, observant I am pleased with the initial visit.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Just met Greg today so far everything went well.

★★★★★
Just met Greg today so far everything went well.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Good chat with Stephanie

★★★★★
Good chat with Stephanie
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I’m so grateful to have found this practice.

★★★★★
I’m so grateful to have found this practice. This is the first person that I felt truly confident in their ability to help me.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Stephanie was great!

★★★★★
Stephanie was great! AJ seemed very comfortable talking to her. Thank you!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I really enjoyed speaking to Ayala

★★★★★
I really enjoyed speaking to Ayala and I’m looking forward to future appointments.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Counseling

★★★★★
My husband and I were having great difficulties in our marriage and seeing Ayala was the last thing we were willing to try before divorce. Ayala helped save our marriage! Not only did she listen and offer support and guidance, she was not judgmental and did not take a side. Ayala was amazing and I would recommend her to any couple who is experiencing marital difficulties.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I had my first visit with Stephanie

★★★★★
I had my first visit with Stephanie the other day and I instantly felt very comfortable with talking to her. She was so nice and was ready to accommodate for my 15 month old son in case he needed to stay during my appointment (and for future appointments) as well!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I had a great experience!

★★★★★
I had a great experience! I was really nervous and anxious going into it, but I felt comfortable as soon as I got there.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

I loved meeting Vivian.

★★★★★
I loved meeting Vivian. She seemed to really understand where I was coming from and what my goals are. So warm, engaging and smart. Really looking forward to working with her.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Great experience!

★★★★★
Great experience!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Excellent, very welcoming.

★★★★★
Excellent, very welcoming. Looking forward to continuing to work with thrive works
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Vivian

★★★★★
Vivian is an exceptional therapist. Our family sessions with her have been an investment in our family's health. We get to the issues quickly and sort out what needs addressing. Vivian validates how we are feeling and helps us to process solutions. It feels like a team effort, and Vivian treats us with the type of care one receives from a family member. She combines her professional skills with a compassion that is rarely found in a therapist. We leave each session with much accomplished and strategies to help us reach our family goals. She greets each session with great enthusiasm, so even the beginning of the session feels like we will get the answers we are seeking.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Vivian

★★★★★
Since this past summer, I found myself having to deal with residual anxiety, PTSD, depression and (what I felt like, was life changing psychosis) that came after the death of my very best friend in a horrific car accident. Long story short, I thought I’d never be normal again, I was sure I’d carry the weight of my problems around with me forever. Not to mention I had all of these issues AND the undeniable pressure of trying to be a college student and working full time. I stumbled into Vivian’s office not long after I realized I was falling apart. Over the course of about six or seven weeks of visiting Vivian, my life has changed completely. I’m a healthy and happy person, planning to move to Worcester at the end of this summer. It’s hard to think that just a few months ago, I had to move home from college to be under the supervision of doctors and my parents. There are not many people in a lifetime that help you dissect the truth of who you are as a person and how you can embrace it. Vivian is an amazing woman with truth and insight beyond what I could achieve on my own. She has an awesome way of saying really intellectual concepts very simply, which helps me to think about myself in a different, more positive way. Vivian went far past just helping me develop strategies to deal with my panic and trauma; she went to the verity of what was making me feel this way. It’s impossible for me to explain the growth and strides I’ve made since going to thrive works. Vivian has made me feel proud, brave and sure of my ability to overcome anything in my life with a new understanding of myself and who I am.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Vivian Sockol

★★★★★
My family and I have been with Vivian for years now. She is an amazing person and goes above and beyond for her clients.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Greg is a Svengali (In a good way)

★★★★★
After only one year of seeing Greg I have transformed my personal and professional life. Battling substance abuse, a marriage on life support, despondent children, unable to hold down a job, financial ruin and depression was what I gave Greg to work with. Undaunted, he listened and did something I did not expect. He never asked me about my Mom or upbringing as a way to lay blame or explain my condition, instead he focused on giving me the tools and encouragement to reverse the cycle and put me on a positive path to rebuild my life. He is a master of individual and couples therapy because of his decades of experience but his approach is less clinical and more conversational. I look forward to my sessions because I always leave feeling energized and motivated to make up for lost time. Thank You Thriveworks for staffing such a high quality individual in Westborough.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Insightful

★★★★☆
Only had 2 appointments, but so far we feel Stephanie is very knowledgeable & insightful!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Excellent therapist

★★★★★
Excellent therapist
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Great first meeting

★★★★★
Great first meeting. Greg is awesome and I'm looking forward to my next appointment.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Thoughtful and direct

★★★★★
Our counselor was thoughtful and direct...after one session I feel very motivated to work towards our goals.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Vivian is wonderful

★★★★★
Vivian has such warmth about her that you feel right at home in her office. She has no judgements but a helpful ear that has made me have what I call "dawning moments". She has helped in a way that has felt empowering to me. I always look forward to our appointments because I know I will always leave feeling as if I have accomplished something substantial. Thank you Vivian!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Excellent experience

★★★★★
Stephanie is a great listener and is very good at getting right to the issues that matter. We've seen others previously who seem to drag out the process, and never want to get involved. Stepanie is the opposite - She is extremely skilled at zooming in on the key issue, unbelievably helpful. Highly recommended!
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Great Referral

★★★★★
I have referred several people in our organization to Greg. The feedback is consistently positive with comments like "helped me figure out the next steps I needed to take", "he walked me through a really tough time" and "very kind."
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Patient focused help

★★★★☆
I have been a client of Greg Handel for about a month and I have already put into practice many of his suggestions to help me. I have been to a few other therapists who continually ask "how does that make you feel", and Greg really guides our conversations into points that will not only benefit me moving forward, but assist me in understanding how I got into the challenges in the first place.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Review

★★★★★
Outstanding environment and very professional staff. Decor of waiting room very conducive to wholeness and well being. Very accessible location and appointment availability is prompt
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Greg is awesome

★★★★★
Amazing ..beyond words ..in only a short time he helped me realize ..that I was standing in my own way ..by letting me figure things out and advising me ..nit pushing me or making me see his viewpoint ..lime more therapist do...Everyone that dees his is very fortunate and blessed to have chosen him...thank you Greg ..you ate a true blessing .. Trish Silva
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Constructive guidance

★★★★★
Thriveworks, Westborough has been both a place of solace and a source of empowerment for me. After being urged to talk with a professional by my family, Iheduled an appointment with Greg Handel. Greg has dispelled the stereotype of what I assumed a therapist to be. Instead of being distant and abstruse, Greg has been relational and engaged, empathetic and pragmatic. The tools that Greg has provided have helped me take steps toward greater confidence and well-being. The combination of reliable competence and patient-focused support has made my experience at positive.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Should’ve done this sooner

★★★★★
Dr. Greg Handel has been fantastic. Although our journey is just beginning its as if I've known him my whole life. really makes it easy to trust and open up. Anyone going through hard times or even just looking to work on themselves should definitely check out this practice..
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Greg is excellent

★★★★★
From my first session with Greg I knew I would make progress quickly in resolving my anger and depression issues. Greg was highly skilled at getting to my root causes immediately, practical with his suggestions and compassionate. I recommend Greg and (a really nice, professional welcoming environment) to all.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Trustworthy Care

★★★★★
Over the past few years, I have referred some clients to Greg Handel. He has been exceptional in handling delicate situations and providing quality counseling services.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Review

★★★★★
I am very happy and thankful that I found Thriveworks. Greg Handel has been great in helping me overcome many obstacles. I look forward to every session.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Understanding with compassion

★★★★★
I have known Greg for a few years and he is always ready to listen and act. He understands complicated situations and handles with grace and tact (a difficult combination). He is always accessible and willing to step in and be resourceful.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

friend

★★★★☆
Greg is immediately engaging with a warm smile and uplifting personality. He has great insight about people and situations, showing genuine concern and desire to help people be the best they can be.
Thriveworks Counseling Westborough

Maybe a great place but yearly fee turned me off

★☆☆☆☆
So I was referred to Thriveworks from a different therapist who was not able to work with me. So I called Thriveworks, desperate for help, and as I talked to a support staff, who was very nice, and thought I found the right place for me. When I was informed that I’d have to pay $80-100 for the year in addition to my co-payments and insurance being billed, I was taken aback. I have the money to pay it, that is not the issue. What about others who may not? Yes I know it’s because there are “support staff” on call or whatever the fee was for, but this deterred me from following up for services, as I have never heard of any counseling office doing this and I work in the mental health field. So Thriveworks, you seem like a great office, but your yearly fee for “supports” or whatever it is for, that you may or may not utilize, doesn’t make sense.
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Thriveworks Counseling

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  • 5 E Main St Suite 3,
    Westborough, MA 01581

  • Mon-Fri:7AM-12AM
    Saturday:7AM-6PM
    Sunday:8AM-5PM

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