Daniel recently broke up with his girlfriend of five years. After she moved out of his house, he began struggling. She played a large role in decorating the house, and every time he turns around he feels like he’s running into her presence. Financially, things have been tight, as he previously had her to pitch in for household expenses. Additionally, his social circle, which once consisted of several couples he and his ex-girlfriend saw frequently, is now much smaller. Daniel needs some help getting back on track.
Breakup Counseling in Charlotte
Dealing with relationship breakups can be harsh and lonely. Even relatively amicable breakups can be difficult to go through. Whether a recent decision to breakup was one-sided or mutual, involved a short-term relationship or a long-term relationship, involved two mentally healthy persons or not, breaking up is one of the most emotional things we can experience—and it’s reasonable to need a little help processing that experience. Breakup counseling can help.
The more serious a relationship, the more difficult the fall out from the breakup (Rhoades, et al). Cohabitation, children, length of relationship, general happiness level while in the relationship—all of these factors and more influence the way the breakup is handled by each partner. In fact, breakups are one of the many situations Thriveworks Charlotte counselors help people with all the time.
More Than Just Losing a Partner
When we dissolve a relationship, we don’t just lose a confidant, lover, friend, and activity partner. All areas of life are impacted. It may take awhile before going to the grocery store alone seems normal. Or, if one was accustomed to starting the day with a conversation over breakfast, the simple act of eating may feel “off” for awhile. Breakup counseling can help with more than just the emotional pain of losing a partner. It can help with the ramifications of breaking up that many may not expect, including:
1) Social withdrawal
Now that your former partner or spouse has departed from your life, you will have to face your old friends and associates alone. This may cause you to withdraw from your former social circles. Or, if some mutual friends withdraw from you after the breakup, that may cause hurt feelings on your part. Our counselors have helped many patients experiencing exactly this—it’s difficult, but you can get through it.
2) Being concerned about financial issues
If losing a partner also means losing financial support, such as help paying the mortgage or electric bill, that can create its own stress. Breakup counseling can help you deal with this stress as well as come up with a plan to manage the new financial responsibility.
3) Finding the mental balance to successfully manage your current situation—It’s easy to become overwhelmed by the emotional rollercoaster of a breakup. Maintaining mental balance during the weeks and months post-breakup is crucial to staying healthy, making good decisions for the future, and healing mentally and emotionally.
All the worries discussed above may lead to the following symptoms that are noticeable in persons who have recently experienced a breakup:
- Lack of motivation
- Unwillingness to associate with other people
- Lack of interest in planning for the future
Handling the complexity of these feelings alone can be overwhelming. Breakup counseling can help you gain a clearer perspective and develop a plan to manage your new life in a productive way.
How Breakup Counseling Works
A therapist experienced at breakup counseling will give you his or her undivided attention in order to help you overcome all physical and psychological challenges. If you are feeling lonely and emotionally disturbed, you can count on your therapist’s deep interest in your problems as he or she works hard to help you.
Consider your relationship therapist an understanding, compassionate person who knows exactly what you are going through and is willing to offer a helping hand until you achieve a full recovery. At Thriveworks Charlotte, our therapists know you can heal—and they can help.
Outlined below are some areas breakup counseling will help you strengthen as you move forward:
- Self-confidence—This will help you embrace yourself as you are; no one can have a great relationship without first loving and admiring themselves
- Problem-solving skills—If you have been relying on a partner to assist in solving certain problems—from which electrician to call to which new car to purchase—it may feel difficult to be totally in charge of making your own decisions. Working with a therapist can help you learn problem-solving skills, enabling you to confidently and thoughtfully make these decisions on your own.
- Self-efficacy—Strongly related to self-confidence, this self-assurance that you can live life on your own terms, completing tasks and achieving goals, is essential to a mentally healthy life.
Thriveworks Charlotte Breakup Counseling
Breaking up is hard to do, but with counseling, that struggle can end with a happier, healthier you who is able to continue forward independently. Later, if you choose to, you’ll be able to enter another relationship in a healthy, engaged fashion. To get started, give Thriveworks Charlotte a call today. We don’t have a waiting list, and can usually get you scheduled within 24 hours. If you are struggling, there’s no need to wait any longer to seek help. We look forward to helping you become the best you can be.
Rhoades, G. K., Kamp Dush, C. M., Atkins, D. C., Stanley, S. M., & Markman, H. J. (2011). Breaking Up is Hard to do: The Impact of Unmarried Relationship Dissolution on Mental Health and Life Satisfaction. Journal of Family Psychology: JFP: Journal of the Division of Family Psychology of the American Psychological Association (Division 43), 25(3), 366–374. http://doi.org/10.1037/a0023627