Are you and your significant other caught in an endless cycle of arguing? Do you bicker about the same things again and again? Maybe you don’t like the way he loads the dishwasher or he complains about your spending habits.
Or perhaps your issues are more serious: One of you has been unfaithful, your sex life is lagging, or a new job or move is stressing you out. Even worse, maybe you are both so tired of fighting that you’ve simply stopped caring and the apathy feels worse than anger or disappointment.
Everyone goes through rough patches in their relationships and there are lots of reasons why couples disagree. Often, these issues work themselves out by simply talking and smoothing over hurt feelings. But when the same arguments or issues are making you feel like your relationship is in trouble, consider reaching out to a mental health professional who specializes in marriage and family counseling to help.
If you’re ready to seek advice from a couples therapist or marriage counselor, contact Thriveworks Counseling in Thousand Oaks, CA to make an appointment and find the support you need.
When Should You Consider Seeing a Couples Counselor?
Couples decide to come to relationship counselors for many reasons. Some of the most common issues addressed in relationship counseling include:
- Lack of intimacy
- Different parenting styles
- Jealousy and trust issues
- Differing viewpoints and life goals
- Financial challenges
- Major life changes
- Substance abuse
- Physical or mental illness
These issues are not uncommon but when they aren’t addressed, they can fester, wreaking havoc on your relationship. If you think this is the right time to get professional help, our expert marriage and family therapists can work with you on more effective communication and provide you with tools to foster a solid, loving partnership.
How Does Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling Work?
Whether you feel like your relationship is hanging on by a thread or it just needs a little more attention, working with a licensed couples counselor can be the key to taking your relationship to the next level.
While there are many types of marriage and family counseling, the first session usually begins with an information session where the therapist listens to each of you as you discuss your concerns and the goals you hope to achieve. Relationship therapy at Thriveworks Counseling in Thousand Oaks, CA provides you with a safe, confidential space to talk about sensitive issues. Whether you choose video sessions, phone calls, or in-person therapy, you can rest assured that our professionals are here to address your concerns and help you build a stronger bond.
Some of the most commonly used couples counseling techniques include:
- The Gottman Method: Developed by relationship therapist Dr. John Gottman, the Gottman Method helps individuals learn how to get rid of defensiveness and work to better understand each other. This type of therapy focuses on four specific relationship issues: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. To address these destructive behaviors, a counselor helps you express appreciation and respect, build trust, and manage conflict.
- Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): EFT was developed by Canadian psychologist Dr. Susan Johnson in the 1980s. This popular form of relationship therapy is used all over the world and centers around three goals: looking at disagreements from a different viewpoint to improve your interactions, developing a deeper bond between you and your partner, and recognizing and building on emotional responses.
- Narrative therapy: Developed by Drs. David Epston and Michael White, narrative therapy aims to separate couples from their problems using specific skills to help control and minimize them. Narrative therapy lets you tell — or narrate — your own story and then create a new narrative to make changes for the better. You will learn how to make room in your life for changes, and identify, reframe, and externalize your problems so you can see them more objectively.
A relationship or marriage therapist may give you “homework” — specific action items like paying each other compliments or using touch to deepen your bond. When you meet with a counselor from Thriveworks Counseling in Thousand Oaks, CA, together you will discover the right course of therapy to improve your relationship.
Turn to Thriveworks Counseling in Thousand Oaks, CA
If it’s hard to stop fighting or you simply want to rekindle the spark in your relationship, consider making an appointment with one of our understanding and professional family therapy experts at Thriveworks in Thousand Oaks, CA.
You can schedule an in-person or remote appointment and new clients can often see a family therapist within 24-48 hours. Thriveworks accepts most major insurance plans and our offices open early and stay open late — even on weekends!
Our clients can access their therapist via email or phone in between appointments, and you can also receive answers about specific relationship issues through our ask-a-coach 24-hour Q&A service. Additional support is also available through our online community discussions moderated by mental health professionals.
Rediscover the love that brought you and your partner together and get out of your relationship rut. Contact Thriveworks Counseling in Thousand Oaks, CA to schedule an appointment with a counselor for relationship therapy to get the support you need. You can be a happy couple once more; we’ll help you get there.