Birmingham Divorce Recovery

Healing from a Divorce in Birmingham, MI—Oakland Counseling for Divorce Recovery 

Wedding plans almost always include the dress, the cake, the food, the party, and the happy ending. No one begins a marriage planning for a divorce, but after the wedding, many marriages never find their happily ever after. Anyone who is going through or has gone through a divorce knows that plans change.

Writing about the end of her marriage, Amy Poehler described divorce, saying, “Imagine spreading everything you care about on a blanket and then tossing the whole thing up in the air. The process of divorce is about loading that blanket, throwing it up, watching it all spin, and worrying what stuff will break when it lands.”

Divorce, indeed, is like having your life thrown into the air. Often, people need have to navigate new realities—custody decisions, legal battles, financial problems, and housing scenarios. At the same time, they often face anger, depression, fear, loneliness, confusion, anxiety, and guilt.
When life is spinning, it may feel like it will never settle, but it will. Divorce is the end of a particular relationship, but it is not the end of a fulfilling, joyful life. Recovering from a divorce is often a painful and difficult process, but many who embrace the challenge find that a new, beautiful life emerges. And no one has to navigate divorce recovery alone. Skilled therapists understand the road to divorce recovery and can provide invaluable guidance at critical times.

That is why Thriveworks Birmingham offers therapy for divorce recovery in Oakland County: we understand the ups and downs of ending a marriage. We also understand that healing is possible.

Undercurrents of Divorce

The surface issues within a marriage that can lead to divorce are infinite—adultery, lying, addiction, money problems, laziness, and on, and on. When people look below the surface, however, there are generally four dynamics that drive couples apart. Psychologist John Gottman has famously studied divorce and marriage, and he calls these undercurrents “the four horsemen.” These fuel disconnection and often lead to divorce.

  • Criticism: Negative comments, put-downs, and nit-picking stifle intimacy and connection, especially if these outweigh positive, healthy, and kind interactions.
  • Stonewalling: Almost all problems can be addressed and resolved, but if they are denied, avoided, or minimized, then these issues grow and can overwhelm a couple. The root problem is not the issue itself, but the avoidance of the issue.
  • Defensiveness: Instead of accepting responsibility and accountability for one’s own choices, defensiveness assumes an air of superiority. Blaming and shifting consequences away from oneself and onto others is a toxic behavior.
  • Contempt: Respect for another’s individuality, thoughts, and feelings is the foundation to any healthy relationship. Contempt undercuts respect and shames others.

Coming out of a marriage that had one or more of these undercurrents often means people need an intentional time of recovery where they can pursue healing and assess any adjustments they need to make for their future.

Divorce Recovery: Working through Pain, Finding Healing

Many losses are incurred at the end of a marriage, and healing often means making peace with grief. It is obvious to see that the marriage relationship ends, but this loss is often the tip of the iceberg. Divorce brings too many losses to list here, but just a few may include…

  • Shifting relationships with extended family/in-laws
  • A lowered standard of living
  • Adjusting to co-parenting or single parenting
  • Losing one’s home
  • Changes in friendships

As people recognize their losses, it is normal for a host of varied emotions to hit them. Grief, at various times, may feel like guilt, denial, bargaining, shock, fear, anger, and sadness. These feelings may rise and fall at unexpected times and in unexpected ways. It is important to allow oneself to feel them. They are often clues into wounds that need healing.

Recovery and healing are rarely easy processes. There is no magic formula, silver bullet, or straight line to a fulfilling future. Missteps will happen. Falling and getting up again are normal parts of the recovery process. So is asking for help.

Recovering from a divorce takes a lot of support—from friends, family, and often a mental health professional. An experienced therapist can be an invaluable source of guidance and support when it is needed most.

Recovering from a Divorce with Thriveworks Birmingham in Oakland County

Is your marriage coming to an end or have you recently finalized a divorce? Thriveworks Birmingham in Oakland County, MI understands the rollercoaster you are riding. We have helped many people navigate the ups and downs of ending a marriage and rebuild a fulfilling, happy life.

If you want to meet with a Thriveworks Birmingham therapist, know that we have done our best to make the process as easy as possible. Going through a divorce is hard. Scheduling therapy should not be. When you call our office, a person will answer. You may be able to meet with your therapist the following day, and we probably take your insurance. We also offer weekend and evening appointments.

Call Thriveworks today. We are ready to help.

Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

People Love Our Providers!

Overall Rating: 5★★★★★ based on 14 5 1 14 reviews. See all reviews
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Great therapist

★★★★★
Andrea Golden is easy to talk with and goes or of her way to give a balanced perspective.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Lindsey is great!

★★★★★
I had the honor of working with Lindsey at a previous job and she is one of the sweetest individuals I have ever met. Lindsey listens intently to everyone and is open to people from all walks of life. Lindsey is knowledgeable and passionate about advocating for mental health. This makes Lindsey a great leader and counselor. I would refer anyone I know to Lindsey!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Mrs

★★★★★
I’ve known Tammy Wagstaff for quite some time. She was very helpful to me for finding my strengths and improving my working and personal relationships. She is a good listener and is able to “see” my point of view . I would highly recommend this counselor
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Review for Sandra Quigley

★★★★★
*****I have been a patient of Sandra's for nearly 2 years now and I really can't say enough good things about her work with me. She is a true Christian counselor and that was exactly the perspective I needed to guide me down the path God was trying to lead me. She definitely strengthened my faith and made many of life's big problems seem like small speed bumps when looking at the big picture!! I highly recommend Sandra Q. if you are looking for the someone who honestly cares about you and the journey you are on. Remember, there’s ultimately only one way to peace in your life, and that’s to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus!! *****
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

I really enjoyed meeting Melissa.

★★★★★
I really enjoyed meeting Melissa. It was easy to converse with her. She was very professional but completely relatable too. I would definitely recommend Thriveworks!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Moving with meaning

★★★★★
Much Gratitude Christine, You're helping me become the best version of myself. The self I've always pictured the vision is clear and I am ready to LIVE!!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

I wouldn’t recommend it – one of the worst therapists I’ve ever seen

★☆☆☆☆
The doctor (PhD) I saw for therapy decided, on the second session, to pay more attention to doing things on his phone than to listening to me. He thought he was hiding what he was doing behind his portfolio, but he was not. I could see the reflection of what he was doing, and he was looking down more than up. He was pretending to listen but didn't do a very good job of that, because when I stopped talking, he would incorrectly try to restate what I said or, make a comment on what I said which turned out to not be relevant because it was clear he wasn't listening. He did not seem to want to be there. It was a horrible experience. I called the next day to complain to the lady on the phone, and got a sincere "I'm sorry" and that's it. When I got the bill (very expensive, by the way), I have been attempting to call the office to pay it over the phone but I keep getting told that the people that do the billing are currently busy and that I should call back. It should not be that difficult for someone to take a credit card number and apply it to my bill, especially a bill I shouldn't have to pay due to horrible service. I hope the other therapists at Thriveworks are better than the one I selected, and actually have interest in helping their patients.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Couldn’t be happier

★★★★★
We couldn't be happier with the staff and help we have received for our family at the practice. Christine has been particularly helpful in assisting myself and our family get back on track.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Comfortable

★★★★★
Comfortable, private space for anyone and everyone in the family to get the personal time and space they need.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

She helped change my life

★★★★★
Dear Marcy, I can't thank you enough for recommending your therapist Dawn Gaden to me. She has helped change my life. I have always struggled with feeling misunderstood. But recently I fell into a deep depression; beyond something I could resolve myself. Therapy was required for my recovery. Since childhood I have been weary of therapists because I would talk through my problems but I didn't get tools and strategies to handle my problems better. Dawn has changed that. For the first time I leave each appointment not only relieved from having talked my issues through, but more importantly with tools to help me move forward. She has introduced me to methods I had considered silly, but now I could live without. I am proud of the person I am becoming and the journey I have chosen to take. Thank you for all you have done to change my life and my family's future.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

She Inspires Hope

★★★★★
I found Sandra Quigley on the web while searching for a Christian counselor. I was having a lot of anxiety about making a career change. She not only helped through the anxieties, she also helped me with concerns in my personal life. Sandra's non-judgmental and compassionate approach, made me feel comfortable and hopeful.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Karen Waldrop

★★★★★
Ms. Waldrop is an active listener and excellent problem solver. She offers practical resolutions to everyday problems for those suffering with depression, life changes, anxiety, and stress. She provides empathy in a quiet manner with a gentle sense of humor. She is capable to offer a variety of tools for those seeking positive and lasting life changes. If you are seeking someone with whom you can discuss your deepest personal issues in a confidential manner I would highly recommend Ms. Karen Waldrop as your therapist.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Everything I needed

★★★★★
I found Sandra Quigley in the back of a magazine (Psychology Today). I desperately needed someone to talk to. Newly retired with plenty of time to allow my mind to take over my life, I felt constantly anxious and very out of sorts. Enter Sandra Quigley- compassionate, non-judgmental, kind, and gentle. She is everything that I needed to heal myself. I had never talked to a therapist before, so this was a new venture. It was very important to me that I find someone with whom I could feel comfortable. Right away, I felt comfortable. I did have assignments; I never was prescribed a single drug. She went out of her way to help me specifically with my issues- finding me articles, books, telling stories. I never felt uncomfortable; I felt and still feel that my time with Sandra is valuable. With Sandra’s help, I have unearthed a much calmer, happier, together self that now wakes up each morning looking forward to the day ahead. We all have our baggage- I never once realized that I could unpack that bag and put my crap away. I now get to walk through life so much lighter!!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

So helpful!

★★★★★
I really love the helpful and peaceful approach at Thriveworks. I have known Marcy for a long time and her ability to work through tough spots and discuss personalities makes her a lot of fun for me. Time flies when we chat and that is a good thing for a guy like me who is always worried about time. I also love Dawn Gadens video blogs! Wow...so insightful and easy to access. I don't see Dawn in counseling but if she is that good on video I have to believe she is great in person. Give a shot...I bet you will love them.
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Thriveworks Counseling

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  • 31000 Lahser Rd #5
    Beverly Hills, MI 48025

  • Mon-Fri:7AM-12AM
    Saturday:7AM-6PM
    Sunday:8AM-5PM

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