Most marital discord is not as exciting, dangerous, or sexy as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s when they play a husband and wife in marriage therapy in the film Mr. and Mrs. Pitt. Your couples therapist may help you open up to each other and promote emotional revelations, but you probably won’t find out that your partner is a contract killer.
The truth is, most causes of conflict in intimate relationships can seem pretty mundane, i.e., “Jeremy never does the dishes” or “Sheila doesn’t hug me enough.” But day in and day out, those seemingly trivial concerns can sometimes add up to big problems. For example, Jeremy’s failure to do the dishes night after night can make Sheila feel agitated and ignored. Sheila’s lack of physical affection can make Jeremy feel unloved. But a professional couples therapist at Thriveworks in Vancouver, WA can help intimate partners understand the deeper meaning and impact of their “mundane” words and gestures. And that can be where the healing in relationships can begin.
Couples therapy and marriage counseling at Thriveworks can serve as a way for spouses and intimate partners to reconnect with each other. These specialized therapists can help their clients gain insight into their feelings and behavior within interpersonal relationships. Our counselors at Thriveworks might be just what you need to feel supported in your marital struggles.
Who Should See a Couples Therapist or Marriage Counselor in Vancouver, WA?
The short answer is that everyone who wants to have a healthy, successful, long-lasting relationship can benefit from marriage counseling. Even celebrity couples who are widely seen as happy have admitted to getting stronger through couples therapy. Barack and Michelle! Will and Jada! Kristen and Dax! There is no stigma attached to asking for help with complicated, emotionally-fraught relationship issues. In fact, seeking a couples therapist can be a sign that your bond is strong and you’re both committed to your relationship.
Thriveworks clients have voiced all kinds of reasons why they want to try couples therapy or marriage counseling in Vancouver, WA. Common objectives for relationship therapy include:
- I don’t want to teach our kids unhealthy patterns.
- I want to reignite our “spark.”
- I’m exhausted from all the fighting and I just don’t want to do it anymore.
- I want us to be more like such-and-such couple (never a great reason for couples therapy, by the way, though it can be revealing).
- I don’t want to feel so angry at my spouse.
- I want to know why we act this way.
- I want a better sex life.
- I need emotional support for his/her chronic illness.
- I want to feel appreciated.
- I want to talk about my feelings without him/her getting defensive.
- I want to know if I should ask for a divorce.
- I’m tempted to have an affair or I’ve had an affair.
- I want to repair the damage from his/her affair.
- I want to figure out a better way to communicate.
- I want to work through his/her/our substance abuse issues.
- We need professional support after a life-changing event.
The list could go on, but you get the idea! There are as many reasons for getting couples therapy as there are couples in this world. And none of the reasons are right or wrong as long as they get you in the door of your therapist’s office—or get you online with your therapist if you’re participating in virtual sessions, as you can at Thriveworks.
How Can I Convince My Partner to See a Couples Therapist with Me?
If your partner is reluctant to see a marriage counselor with you, it may help to prepare yourself for that tough conversation by learning some common misconceptions about couples therapy and how to counter them. For example:
- Reluctant partner: We should be able to fix this on our own.
- You: Maybe you’re right, but it would be a lot quicker and easier to try to work through our issues with a counselor. Couples therapy is usually solution-focused and accomplishes its goals in fewer than 12 sessions. And it’s courageous to ask for help from a licensed expert. You wouldn’t try to repair your car by yourself, would you? (Don’t use this argument if our spouse is a car mechanic.)
- Reluctant partner: We can’t afford the luxury of relationship therapy.
- You: Therapy isn’t a luxury; it’s an essential service. Think of what’s at stake and what we could lose if we don’t receive the support we need. Plus marriage counselors at Thriveworks in Vancouver, WA accept medical insurance.
- Reluctant partner: I’m too busy. I don’t have time for therapy.
- You: Actually, my dear, we can do the counseling sessions online at our convenience and get the same benefits of in-person therapy. We can even hold appointments on nights or weekends and you won’t have to take time off work.
- Reluctant partner: A therapist would probably just take your side.
- You: Marriage counselors don’t take sides. They are trained to see conflicts from the perspective of both partners and look for solutions that everyone can agree on.
- Reluctant partner: But we’re different from other couples. We’re gay/interracial/Christian/etc.
- You: Of course we are different! We’re the best! But also we can find a top-rated counselor at Thriveworks who has experience helping couples who are similar to us.
Hopefully, your partner will eventually run out of excuses not to see a couples therapist and you can both commit fully to the rewarding process.
Book Me an Appointment with an Exceptional Marriage Counselor at Thriveworks
Our couples therapists and marriage counselors at Thriveworks in Vancouver, WA are standing by to meet with you and your spouse for the first time and initiate the process of reconnection.
When you enroll at Thriveworks, you get access to your therapist between sessions via phone and email. You also get to use our Ask-a-Coach 24hr Q&A service and read our helpful e-books on topics like depression. Call today to book your first session, which could take place online or in-person as early as tomorrow.