I can’t seem to stop flying off the handle whenever I get angry. It seems I’m unable to talk about things in a rational state of mind when I’m angry. It’s really starting to affect my marriage really badly. I don’t know what to do about it, I really need help.
Past repeated incidents of intense frustrations or feeling unjustly treated may condition us to respond angrily to triggers that remind us of those incidents. Or, there may be an underlining cognition or emotion that can be easily trigger anger with the slightest provocation. However, we may not know what these triggers are and our response to them may be reflexive. We may later regret our actions because we are not consciously aware of what triggered them.
Meeting with a trained therapist will be helpful in identifying those triggers, discovering how those triggers initially developed and developing alternative, more adaptive responses to those triggers.