Beverly Hills, MI Codependency Counseling

Overcoming Codependency—Therapists in Beverly Hills, MI

Anyone who has flown on an airplane knows that before take-off, the flight attendants go over safety protocols for oxygen masks in case of an emergency. The most important rule: secure your own mask before helping other people secure theirs. These instructions draw on an important principle for life: self-care comes before caring for others. People who cannot breathe should not try to help others breathe. But many people struggle with this concept in everyday life. When people try to help too often or too much, they may actually cause harm. When this becomes a pattern in people’s lives, they may struggle with codependency.

Think about Dennis. He has a 20-something son who is capable but needs a lot of help. Dennis pays for his son’s rent, utilities, and tuition because it’s his duty as the father. Dennis is happy to do it, besides, who else would? Dennis has a plan for his son to finish school and find his own place to live, but his son keeps dropping classes or changing his major. Dennis is disappointed that his son is not taking hold of the opportunities that he never had as a young adult.
Dennis, without a doubt, loves his son deeply, but he may have a serious problem. Dennis’ actions, while intended to help, may actually be harming his son and himself—his actions may be codependent.
Many people find themselves in places where they feel obligated to help or they help in a way that hurts themselves or others. That is why Thriveworks Beverly Hills offers therapy for codependency: our counselors love seeing their clients overcome codependent behaviors and learn how to help from their strengths.

Codependency: What Is It?

People who struggle with codependency may seek out relationships with people they think they can fix—often addicts or people who exhibit careless behavior. Codependent people can form relationships in various contexts—as a spouse, as a parent, as a friend. Within the relationships, codependent people usually set aside their own needs and well-being to meet another person’s needs or to appease them.

Codependent people often appear to be overly nice or unbelievably charitable, but as relationships develop, their own harmful behavior surfaces. Internally, codependent people can be overwhelmed with insecurity, shame, and passivity. Fixing other people becomes a way of proving their competency or gaining love.

Delineating codependent behavior from appropriate help and support is challenging at times. The following are unhealthy characteristics of codependents:

  • Minimization: Because codependent people often appear to be helping, it is hard for them to acknowledge the harm they cause and work on their own feelings of inadequacy instead of focusing their attention on others.
  • Challenges with setting boundaries: Codependent individuals have a hard time saying, “no.” They may give into unreasonable requests because they are afraid of losing the relationship.
  • Caretaking: Codependents may tie their identity to what they do to take care of people. When people decline help, they often take the response personally—that the person is reject them, not just their help.
  • Dependency: A famous song lyric describes a codependent attitude well, “I want you to want me. I need you to need me.” Codependent people need other people to fix—the helping attitude often comes from a selfish motive.
  • Obsession: Fear and anxiety can drive codependent people to obsess about other people or fixate upon them.
  • Low self-esteem: For many codependent individuals, their self-worth is intertwined with how much they can help or do for others, instead of their inherent dignity.
  • Tendencies to people-please: Codependents often feel obligated to keep everyone happy. When others are upset, angry, or disappointed, codependents may feel responsible and try to fix the difficult emotions.
  • Poor communication skills: Fears of upsetting other people often keep codependent people from expressing their own needs, feelings, and thoughts.

Therapy for Codependency at Thriveworks Beverly Hills, MI

With the help of a skilled therapist, many people have overcome their codependency and learned new, healthier ways to connect. In therapy, codependents often learn how to…

  1. Focus on and prioritize their own needs.
  2. Recognize and honor their own needs, thoughts, and feelings.
  3. Value themselves for their inherent worth.
  4. Learn and practice new, healthier ways to be in relationship.

Have codependent behaviors become a pattern your life? Do you struggle to prioritize your own self-care before helping others? Learn how to put the oxygen mask on yourself before you help others.
When you are ready to make a change, Thriveworks Beverly Hills is ready to support and guide the way. When you schedule therapy at our office, know that you make an evening or weekend appointment. New clients often see their therapist the day after their call. We also work with many insurance providers. Real people (not a voicemail) answer our phones.

Prioritizing your own well-being may begin with a call to schedule therapy. Are you ready? Let’s go.

Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

People Love Our Providers!

Overall Rating: 5★★★★★ based on 14 5 1 14 reviews. See all reviews
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Great therapist

★★★★★
Andrea Golden is easy to talk with and goes or of her way to give a balanced perspective.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Lindsey is great!

★★★★★
I had the honor of working with Lindsey at a previous job and she is one of the sweetest individuals I have ever met. Lindsey listens intently to everyone and is open to people from all walks of life. Lindsey is knowledgeable and passionate about advocating for mental health. This makes Lindsey a great leader and counselor. I would refer anyone I know to Lindsey!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Mrs

★★★★★
I’ve known Tammy Wagstaff for quite some time. She was very helpful to me for finding my strengths and improving my working and personal relationships. She is a good listener and is able to “see” my point of view . I would highly recommend this counselor
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Review for Sandra Quigley

★★★★★
*****I have been a patient of Sandra's for nearly 2 years now and I really can't say enough good things about her work with me. She is a true Christian counselor and that was exactly the perspective I needed to guide me down the path God was trying to lead me. She definitely strengthened my faith and made many of life's big problems seem like small speed bumps when looking at the big picture!! I highly recommend Sandra Q. if you are looking for the someone who honestly cares about you and the journey you are on. Remember, there’s ultimately only one way to peace in your life, and that’s to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus!! *****
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I really enjoyed meeting Melissa.

★★★★★
I really enjoyed meeting Melissa. It was easy to converse with her. She was very professional but completely relatable too. I would definitely recommend Thriveworks!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Moving with meaning

★★★★★
Much Gratitude Christine, You're helping me become the best version of myself. The self I've always pictured the vision is clear and I am ready to LIVE!!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

I wouldn’t recommend it – one of the worst therapists I’ve ever seen

★☆☆☆☆
The doctor (PhD) I saw for therapy decided, on the second session, to pay more attention to doing things on his phone than to listening to me. He thought he was hiding what he was doing behind his portfolio, but he was not. I could see the reflection of what he was doing, and he was looking down more than up. He was pretending to listen but didn't do a very good job of that, because when I stopped talking, he would incorrectly try to restate what I said or, make a comment on what I said which turned out to not be relevant because it was clear he wasn't listening. He did not seem to want to be there. It was a horrible experience. I called the next day to complain to the lady on the phone, and got a sincere "I'm sorry" and that's it. When I got the bill (very expensive, by the way), I have been attempting to call the office to pay it over the phone but I keep getting told that the people that do the billing are currently busy and that I should call back. It should not be that difficult for someone to take a credit card number and apply it to my bill, especially a bill I shouldn't have to pay due to horrible service. I hope the other therapists at Thriveworks are better than the one I selected, and actually have interest in helping their patients.
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Couldn’t be happier

★★★★★
We couldn't be happier with the staff and help we have received for our family at the practice. Christine has been particularly helpful in assisting myself and our family get back on track.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Comfortable

★★★★★
Comfortable, private space for anyone and everyone in the family to get the personal time and space they need.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

She helped change my life

★★★★★
Dear Marcy, I can't thank you enough for recommending your therapist Dawn Gaden to me. She has helped change my life. I have always struggled with feeling misunderstood. But recently I fell into a deep depression; beyond something I could resolve myself. Therapy was required for my recovery. Since childhood I have been weary of therapists because I would talk through my problems but I didn't get tools and strategies to handle my problems better. Dawn has changed that. For the first time I leave each appointment not only relieved from having talked my issues through, but more importantly with tools to help me move forward. She has introduced me to methods I had considered silly, but now I could live without. I am proud of the person I am becoming and the journey I have chosen to take. Thank you for all you have done to change my life and my family's future.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

She Inspires Hope

★★★★★
I found Sandra Quigley on the web while searching for a Christian counselor. I was having a lot of anxiety about making a career change. She not only helped through the anxieties, she also helped me with concerns in my personal life. Sandra's non-judgmental and compassionate approach, made me feel comfortable and hopeful.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Karen Waldrop

★★★★★
Ms. Waldrop is an active listener and excellent problem solver. She offers practical resolutions to everyday problems for those suffering with depression, life changes, anxiety, and stress. She provides empathy in a quiet manner with a gentle sense of humor. She is capable to offer a variety of tools for those seeking positive and lasting life changes. If you are seeking someone with whom you can discuss your deepest personal issues in a confidential manner I would highly recommend Ms. Karen Waldrop as your therapist.
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

Everything I needed

★★★★★
I found Sandra Quigley in the back of a magazine (Psychology Today). I desperately needed someone to talk to. Newly retired with plenty of time to allow my mind to take over my life, I felt constantly anxious and very out of sorts. Enter Sandra Quigley- compassionate, non-judgmental, kind, and gentle. She is everything that I needed to heal myself. I had never talked to a therapist before, so this was a new venture. It was very important to me that I find someone with whom I could feel comfortable. Right away, I felt comfortable. I did have assignments; I never was prescribed a single drug. She went out of her way to help me specifically with my issues- finding me articles, books, telling stories. I never felt uncomfortable; I felt and still feel that my time with Sandra is valuable. With Sandra’s help, I have unearthed a much calmer, happier, together self that now wakes up each morning looking forward to the day ahead. We all have our baggage- I never once realized that I could unpack that bag and put my crap away. I now get to walk through life so much lighter!!
Thriveworks Counseling Birmingham

So helpful!

★★★★★
I really love the helpful and peaceful approach at Thriveworks. I have known Marcy for a long time and her ability to work through tough spots and discuss personalities makes her a lot of fun for me. Time flies when we chat and that is a good thing for a guy like me who is always worried about time. I also love Dawn Gadens video blogs! Wow...so insightful and easy to access. I don't see Dawn in counseling but if she is that good on video I have to believe she is great in person. Give a shot...I bet you will love them.
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Thriveworks Counseling

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  • 31000 Lahser Rd #5
    Beverly Hills, MI 48025

  • Mon-Fri:7:30AM-9PM
    Saturday:7AM-6PM
    Sunday:8AM-5PM

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